At a recent American Chamber of Commerce Japan networking party, I watched a sponsor of the event, a tall, powerfully built man, trying to introduce his financial services company to the boisterous and somewhat drunk crowd. It was an uphill battle from the start. Though he had paid, with his sponsorship, for the right to address the crowd, he was clearly at cross purposes with them. They were there to chat with old friends and make new contacts, not to listen to an investment pitch.
No one paid the slightest attention to him. He tried talking over the crowd. He tried “shushing” them. He tried glaring angrily. He tried barking sternly at them to shut up. He tried bargaining by promising to only take a moment of their time. In short, he tried everything but being more interesting and compelling than the person they were already talking to. He finally gave up and mumbled his way through his talking points, before slinking off the stage.
The next speaker, a physically unremarkable guy, strode to the microphone and, with just a few words, had complete silence and attention from the audience. So what was the difference? The second speaker had an undeniable presence. He radiated a calm confidence that drew everyone’s attention to him. He knew from the start that they would listen to him, that they would want to listen to him, just as the first speaker seemed to know that no one would.
I think everyone has seen people like that. Some people just command our attention. They have charisma. Yet I’ve never heard a good definition of what charisma is. That’s what we are going to try to puzzle out through this conversation.
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