The ability to read an audience, while you are speaking, and to adjust your content or style of delivery on the fly, is generally considered to be a very high level skill for a speaker.
Just trying to remember what you are supposed to say, and reminding yourself to keep your hands out of your pockets and not say, “Ummmm”, is tough enough for most of us. Who has the mental capacity to adjust to the audience, too?
Sure, a professional speaker who has spent hundreds of hours of stage, and knows their material inside and out, might be able to pull it off. Maybe one of those freaks of nature that actually gets a thrill out of being the center of attention could do it.
But isn’t that setting the bar a bit too high for us average people who find ourselves fumbling through a presentation at work or a toast at a banquet?
No.
Reading the reactions of others and adjusting our own behavior is not a magical skill or a masterful technique. It is something each and every one of us does every day of our own lives.
It is what you do, when you are having a great day and you run into your friend who seems distressed about something. It is what you do, when you toss out a lighthearted comment at work and are rewarded with stern looks and furrowed brows. It is what you do, when you are feeling down, but your friend tells you some exciting and wonderful news.
You adjust your own behavior to reflect what you see in others; in their expressions and in their body language.
You immediately adjust your tone in sympathy with the distressed friend. You adopt a more serious and professional persona to match the prevailing mood of the business situation. You try to lighten your own attitude, in order to share in your friend’s happiness. You are responding to what you read in others every time you interact. That’s what it means to be a social being.
So what we are really talking about here is not some magical skill possessed by professional speakers, but simply the quality of paying attention to the people you are talking to – not speaking at – but talking to.
Focus out on the audience. Look into their eyes. Watch their faces. Pay attention to their posture and gestures.
You already know how to read the physical language. You know what the signs mean. You know what impatience, disagreement, confusion and enthusiasm look like. And you know how to adjust what you say in response.
It’s not magic or mastery. You do it every day.
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